When it comes to weddings, I immediately think of how much time, energy, planning, and money goes into orchestrating the perfect day. The pressures to make everything "just right". The never-ending Pinterest boards, magazines, and options! So many options!
I must confess - before getting engaged, I never dreamt about what my wedding would be like. I always imagined myself as a wife but never as a bride. After Sebastian put a ring on it, you can imagine my shock when I signed up on The Knot only to discover I had 179 things on my to-do list. One hundred and seventy nine to-dos.
I kind of went from elated, over-the-moon joy to my stomach flying into my throat, jaw dropping to the floor, while my eyes simultaneously poppd out of their sockets.
Yeah, a little something like that.
There's been a lot of new (and stunning!) faces around here lately, so I'll fill you in on the juicy details if you've missed out...
Last June, Sebastian and I journeyed to Europe with family and friends. We partied in Poland during the Euro Cup, I met Sebastian's extended-family for the first time, and I learned how to handle all those vodka shots. We then hopped on a plane over to Rome just the two of us. We wined, dined, and explored, nearly losing our feet in the process. It was a whirlwind. It was magic. It was so much more than I ever could have expected. And, he waited until just four days before the end of our Euro trip before getting down on one knee and proposing in the city he was born in.
In the beginning of the planning process, it was a challenge to really narrow down on what we wanted. There's so many things that I/we thought we wanted, but really didn't. At times, we got swept up in the circus of everything, only to realize it wasn't what we truly wanted.
Now, we're just under three months away from hopping on a plane and flying down to the Dominican to get hitched! Sometimes I just have to pinch myself because it doesn't feel real. And you know what the weirdest thing is? I'm not stressed.
Say whaaat?
For real. Deciding to have a destination wedding was hands-down the best decision we could have made. They do everything. Of course, there's small things like favors, stationary, and small decor that you bring with you to make it personal, but for the most part, it's taken care of.
After seeing my enormous to-do list, seeing how stressful it's been for friends, reading through all the wedding resources, I sat there the other night, just thinking about it all. And you know what I did? I cried. Why wasn't I stressed out? Was I doing it wrong? Am I not doing enough? I'm not even joking. I was getting emotional because I wasn't stressed out. Backwards, huh? (That self-doubt is always ready to pounce, I tell you.)
Whether you're planning to board a plane, or tie the knot locally, here's some things that have helped me along the way...
1. KNOW THAT IT WILL ALL WORK OUT. Get it in that pretty little brain of yours! The one constant in life is that it's always willing to throw out some (major) curveballs. Don't get worked up over it, just know that this is life's way of bringing you something different. Think of it as a juicy present. Sometimes it's the unexpected messes that bring everything together to create perfection.
2. BREATHE. PLEASE, JUST BREATHE. Feeling overwhelmed? Walk. Away. From. The. Computer. Put down the phone! Get some perspective. Coordinating to get together a big group of your family and friends can prove to be challenging. Don't sweat the small stuff. Take some time for yourself and take a few deep breathes. You know what? Let's do it right now. Breathe in through your nose and count to 4, then exhale and count to 6.
Inhale for..1...2...3...4...
Exhale for...1...2...3...4...5...6...
And again,
1...2...3...4...
1...2...3...4...5...6...
Doesn't that feel good?!
3. ASK FOR HELP. You are strong and fiercely independent. It's completely natural for you to want to do everything yourself. But giiirl, take it easy! You are surrounded by love. That huge group of love doesn't want you getting all crazy. No need to be she-woman if you don't need to. Delegate. Ask for help. Talk it out with someone.
4. SEE THE BIGGER PICTURE. You're getting married! And you know what? That's pretty freaking incredible. You have come into this life and found your soulmate. High five to that! In 20-30-40+ years from now, you're not going to look back on it all and think, "But it wasn't as pretty as all those Pinterest boards." "I wish I had bought _________."
It's not about pleasing everyone but yourself, it's not about draining your bank account, it's not about comparison, and it's certainly not worth sacrificing your health and/or sanity over it.
How about we make a pact? Let's all shift our focus back to what weddings are really about. It's two lives uniting together through love. Wicked awesome love powerful enough to move mountains! The kind of love that's so rare to find, but when you do, you'll do anything to protect it. THAT'S what it's all about. And let me just say, it's pretty damn beautiful.
Are you in the midst of wedding planning? How's it going? (Or are you already married? If so, I'd love to hear any wedding tips you might have for me!)
P.S. In case you missed it, here's a look at our engagement photos.
Images: All images were taken from my own Wedding Inspiration pinboard. Find them here. xx